drunk hubby

Another weekend. I guess I need to start to go to real Alanon not just ACOA. Once again my husband got high & drunk and is now basically passed out. He is a super controlled drinker and doesn't use during the week (he even goes to his own Alanon mtgs) but once we have an event to go to where liquor is served he gets (in my opinion) drunk inappropriately. True he is not falling down (but he is holding the glass very dangerously to the side). He will even think of driving (of course I take the keys). He claims it is just social drinking but the words he uses, etc I know he is high. I think about all the day time drinking/sneaking drinking I did. He could never pull that off b/c it is just so obvious he is out of it. He get super non-violent argumentative "who gives a rats ass" which he thinks is laid back, he makes up stories that are complete lies (like my dad) or super lovey dovey. The lovey part drives me nuts as he is never like that when he is sober. What am I supposed to do with the love pats when his breath makes me want to vomit (or worse join him w/ a drink).

Our other problem which I guess I have control over is that in somewhat typical male fashion he makes none of our social plans. Every thing we do is with my friends who are predominately sober. Yes we end up where alcohol is served sort-of (once at a completely sober wedding at a hotel he went out to the hotel bar bought a drink and brought it back into the banquet room). But yes it is in my power to not go to places with him and my sober friends b/c even if no alcohol is there if it is a Fri/Sat night he will get high before he goes. We could go just out by ourselves or I could go out alone w/ my friends if it embarrasses me that he drinks.

Maybe he is an alcoholic. And it wouldn't be so bad if I knew someday he would get sober. But since he is able to control it so well I don't think he will ever see the need to get help. I am going to have to figure out a way to live with this or to not and leave him.

xox WR